First and foremost it means that to achieve well-balanced, nurturing, enjoyable working relationships, deficiencies in emotional competency will need to be identified and strengthened. You will need to take a good, unflinching look at habitual attitudes, responses and ways of relating to see whether these have become negatively entrenched and unproductive. There are many ‘personality’ type quizzes which point in this direction, but infinitely more telling are some simple, basic questions:

1. Are you happy with your GP colleagues?
2. Are you happy with the staff at your practice?
3. Can you trust the people you work with?
4. Can you speak openly and freely about your concerns with them?
5. Do you like them?
6. Do you feel liked?
7. Do you feel valued?
8. Do you value those with whom you work?
9. Do you feel that your working relationships nurture you and ease you through your day?
10. Do you feel that you nurture others at work?
11. Do you think you are easy to get along with?
12. Is work a place where you experience enjoyment with others?
13. Do you feel part of a team?
14. Are you happy with yourself in your role in the practice?

If your responses to these questions is largely negative and you want to change this, then a good way to make a start is by looking at your own current behaviour.

A willingness to heighten one’s awareness of current behaviour patterns is perhaps the most significant move one can make in the direction of strengthening emotional competence.

It is often the case in General Practice, as for other busy professions, that the clients get the lion’s share of the nurturing, considerate, caring side of the team, leaving little available for colleagues.

Remember that in all relationships with others the only person you can change is yourself.